How To Flirt With A Girl: 15 Ways To Do It Like A Boss (With Examples)

Today you’re going to learn how to flirt with a girl in an attractive way.

I’m going to share with you some powerful tips you can use in your next interaction with a woman in order to flirt with her.

You’ll also learn how to flirt with a girl over text, online, at work, in college, and so on.

flirtation

Let’s get started.

1. Maintain a positive and charming attitude:

The definition of flirting you get with a Google search is as follows:

Behave as though sexually attracted to someone, but playfully rather than with serious intentions.

As for my definition of flirting, it is basically the same:

Flirting is about creating sexual attraction and excitement in a light and playful way.

For this to happen, you should convey the right emotions: positive emotions.

Emotions that allow the girl to relax and just let go in the present moment.

If you put too much pressure on yourself or if you take the interaction too seriously, it’ll be much harder to achieve this kind of vibe.

Your intention should be just to have fun.

To play with the girl in a more or less sexual way.

Not to kiss or bed her at all costs.

See the interaction as a game where the outcome doesn’t really matter to you.

Having this state of mind will make all the difference.

2. Use your gaze in a way that creates sexual tension:

If you’re wondering how to flirt with a girl without talking, you’ll love this tip.

how to flirt with a girl without being obvious

You can create excitement just by using your gaze.

By looking at the girl deep into the eyes.

When you look a girl deep in her eyes, you create a bond between you and her.

She feels that something is happening.

She feels a connection.

She feels some sexual tension.

This is most effective when there’s no need to look at her, such as when neither of you are talking, for example.

You’re sitting face to face or next to her, there’s a lull in the conversation, and you just look at her in silence.

On the other hand, when it is absolutely normal for you to be looking at her (for instance while saying something to her), the impact is less powerful.

It is precisely when there’s no reason to be looking at each other that looking her deep in the eyes is going to generate sexual tension.

seducer

Looking her deep in the eyes in a prolonged manner is also a great way to make her feel your masculinity.

She feels that you’re solid.

You don’t look away like a guy who’s afraid of staring at her in a prolonged manner.

As a result, she is going to naturally become more attracted.

3. Create excitement with a charming smirk:

Making a little smirk at some key moments of the interaction can be a very effective way to create excitement.

It can help you create the positive and exciting vibe you want to bring on.

Here, the timing is important:

It’s by doing it at the right time that it’ll have the biggest impact.

As with deeply look into her eyes, it is most effective when done during a lull.

It’s when neither of you are talking that it can be the most powerful, because the girl can then fully sense the exciting vibe that it brings into the interaction.

You can also do it when she’s saying something to you while looking her right in the eyes and smiling in a cheeky way (as if you know something she doesn’t).

You can also smile right after letting your eyes dwell on a sexual part of her face or body: for instance, you can look for one or two seconds at her lips, then look her in the eyes again while giving her a smirk.

That’s how a little smirk can help you generate sexual tension in a playful way.

The dosage is as well important:

If you overdo it, you can kill the sexual tension.

Smiling too often or without interruption can make you look retarded, nervous, or strange (and sometimes all three at once).

You’ll agree with me when I say that that’s not a good thing if you want to create attraction.

So use this technique sparingly.

By doing so, you’ll allow your smirks to have the desired effect.

4. Keep some mystery:

Mystery is something very powerful when it comes to flirting with a girl.

With mystery, you arouse her curiosity.

You arouse her interest.

By keeping some mystery, you allow her to make up stories in her head.

You allow her to think about exciting stuff in order to fill the gaps you left by not revealing everything about yourself and your intentions.

Conversely, if there’s no mystery, be it about yourself or your intentions, things get much less exciting.

So try not to reveal too much.

Focus on the girl. Make the conversation about her or the situation, not about you.

And when she asks you a question about yourself, keep your answer short. Leave some suspense.

5. Give her a compliment:

Complimenting a woman is a great way to create sexual tension.

It’s a great way to flirt with a girl you just met.

When you compliment a girl, you communicate that you have some interest in her.

You lead her to wonder if this interest is sexual or not.

Or to wonder what your intentions are.

You also generate positive emotions, which is likely to put her in the right state of mind for you to flirt with her.

how to flirt with a girl tips

Here, it is crucial that you deliver your compliment the right way:

You should deliver it with confidence.

You shouldn’t be ashamed to make it.

You should embrace it.

And you shouldn’t do it in order to get an approbation or a validation from the girl.

How she takes your compliment doesn’t matter.

It doesn’t change what made you think of making this compliment.

Neither should you make your compliment in order to please her.

Your purpose should just be to express yourself.

So when you compliment a girl, do it in a solid way:

With a deep, slow, and confident voice.

By looking the girl right in the eyes (or at the subject of the compliment: a piece of her clothing or a body part).

And after having made your compliment, don’t wait for an answer from the girl.

What she thinks about it is irrelevant.

What matters is that you planted a seed into her head: she feels desired by you, and this turns her on.

6. Whisper something in her ear:

Whispering something into the ear of a girl is a great way to initiate flirting.

Firstly, because it gets you physically closer (more on that below).

And secondly, because it creates an arousing unity between you two. You’re sharing a secret and it’s exciting.

how to flirt with a girl examplesI used this tip not long ago to initiate flirting at the birthday party of the girlfriend of a good friend.

She rented a cabin in the mountains for the occasion and invited a few friends, including a sexy brunette called Sarah.

We didn’t really pay attention to each other during the first part of the party, but at some point during the night, something turned her on.

For some reason I don’t remember, everybody had gone upstairs.

And when it came time to go back downstairs, Sarah was walking just in front of me, heading for the stairs.

But at the moment she started to reach the stairs, I decided to stop her and whisper in her ear:

– Me: “You can’t go first. The man should go first. You know why?”
– Her: “No, why?”
– Me: “It’s normal etiquette. It allows the man to catch the woman in case she falls.”

After this, the flirting was on.

Just because I whispered something into her ear with a little cheeky smile on my face.

Sarah instantly felt some sexual energy flowing.

She also felt that I wanted to play.

It made her horny and she started in turn to play with me.

Things got hotter and hotter and we ended up sleeping together.

Remember this the next time you want to flirt with a girl.

You can build sexual tension just by whispering something into her ear in a smooth and playful way.

If what you tell her is sexual or sexually polarizing, it’s even better.

7. Hold her hand a little bit longer than necessary:

With this little tip, you can initiate flirting with a girl as soon as you meet her for the first time.

All you have to do is hold her hand a little bit longer than usual when saying the usual “Nice to meet you.”

It’s important that you look her deep in the eyes when doing so.

This is what is going to create attraction.

You can add a slight cheeky smile if you want.

Just avoid the big bright smile, as it’s likely to kill the sexual tension, since it makes you look too invested and/or nervous.

8. Reduce the physical space between you and the girl:

When you keep moving closer and closer to each other, it’s a sign that something is going on between you two.

Independently of what you might be talking about.

Women seldom verbalize their interest. They make sure that it’s the man who makes the big moves.

What she does, however, is let things happen.

If she’s interested, she’ll allow the physical space between you to shrink.

romancing

For instance, she’ll be at ease having her leg touching yours when sitting next to you.

She’ll be at ease having her arm touching yours when standing or walking next to you.

She’ll be at ease having her ass touching you when standing in front of you.

This proximity can be quite arousing for a girl.

If it’s often a consequence of her being attracted to you, it can also be a cause of attraction.

It can trigger sexual excitement and make her very horny.

When you feel that she’s at ease with your physical proximity, you can go further by starting to caress her.

You can, for instance, caress her hip, her hand, her back…discreetly (I like to do this at parties, when other people might be looking, it spices things up and makes the flirting even more exciting).

9. Physically push her:

When you push a girl away, you make her want to chase you.

And conversely, when you keep pulling her, she might get bored and walk away.

how to flirt with a girl sitting next to you

That’s why it’s important to push her sometimes.

It makes her feel that you want to play.

It generates excitement.

It makes her want to flirt.

There are various ways you can push a girl away:

Verbally (more on that below) and physically.

If you’re wondering how to flirt with a girl physically, try this:

When she says or does something rude or strange (or something you don’t or might not like), place your hand on her arm or shoulder, then (gently) push her away while looking her deep in the eyes with a facial expression saying “No…not you…” or “No…you’re not that kind of girl…” (you can even say it out loud).

At the end of your pushing her away, you give her a cheeky smile so that she can realize that you’re playing with her.

After that, you’ll see that she’ll come back to you, closer than before.

She might even touch you on the torso and laugh in a sexual way.

You’ll have attracted her by pushing her away.

Powerful, isn’t it?

You can, for instance, do this after the girl told you she’s been binge watching this TV show that you find boring, or after she told you she likes this comedian who makes bad jokes, or after she told you about something strange or rude she did once.

The examples are countless.

You can comment on this right before or during your pushing the girl away.

10. Tease her:

Teasing a girl is another way of pushing her away.

And as you’ve understood, pushing a girl away can be quite an effective way to initiate flirting.

It makes the girl want to come back and chase you.

It makes her want to play with you.

Teasing a girl is about making fun of her in a playful way.

To do this, you can use something she just said or did.

Here it’s important that you don’t tease her over something that is too serious or important to her.

If you tease her on one of her complexes or something she’s too insecure about, it won’t have the desired effects. Quite the contrary.

That’s why in order to tease a girl in a way that will make her want to flirt, you should do it with things that don’t matter much.

11. How to flirt with a girl at work:

Let’s face it:

The workplace is not the best place to pick up girls.

You’ll agree with me when I say that if your boss sees you approaching girls or overtly flirting with a colleague, he’s not going to like it.

Especially if you’re doing that instead of doing your work.

Flirting at work is unprofessional.

There are jobs where you don’t have time to flirt with women in the workplace.

Now, there are jobs where you have idle time and can allow yourself to flirt with a colleague you find attractive.

toying

But you should do it in a way that doesn’t put her reputation (or yours) at risk.

It should be done in a discreet manner.

To do so, you can use the flirting techniques above that don’t make your flirting obvious.

Avoid the techniques that involve physical proximity, as an outside observer can tell right away that something is going on. They can also make the girl uncomfortable.

You should instead use your gaze and your cheeky smile, as well as tease her.

You can compliment her on her clothing, her hairs, her lipstick, her earrings…but not on her legs or butt.

To initiate flirting with a girl at work, wait until you’re alone with her, or at least when other colleagues can’t hear you (or can’t see you, depending on the flirting technique you’re going to use).

It’ll allow the girl to be much more receptive and at ease.

And if she doesn’t want to play or is not interested when you try to initiate flirting, you’ll be able to tell that it’s because she’s not into you (and not because she’s afraid of looking unprofessional in front of your other colleagues).

12. How to flirt with a girl in college:

It’s much easier to flirt with a girl in college or university than with a girl at work.

Flirting there is socially acceptable and you don’t run the risk of looking “unprofessional” by doing so.

The only time where you should be careful is during class.

But aside from this, you can flirt on many occasions:

  • In a hall or corridor, in between classes or waiting for a teacher
  • At the coffee machine or cafeteria
  • At a party or other social event
  • In the library
  • Even in class when sitting next to her (and if both of you find the lesson boring)

How you will initiate flirting largely depends on the context and the situation.

Sometimes you’ll be able to use all the techniques above.

how to flirt with a girl you don't know

Make sure to be alone with the girl when you intend to flirt with her, and not in a group of friends or acquaintances.

She’ll be much more at ease if she sees that no outsider can judge her reaction.

There can be people around, but just not in your set.

You should be the only one interacting with her.

13. How to flirt with a girl that has a boyfriend:

Flirting with a girl who has a boyfriend can be quite touchy.

Here’s why:

Most women don’t want to be seen as sluts or whores.

They care about their (public) reputation.

And what happens when a girl is seen flirting with other guys?

She’s likely to be seen as a pushover or as a slut.

And most girls don’t want that.

That’s why girls who have a boyfriend are usually more cautious when interacting with other guys.

dallianceFlirting with a girl who has a boyfriend requires a bit of tact.

You should do it in a discreet way.

Don’t try to initiate flirting in a too obvious manner in front of her friends.

It’s better if you can isolate her before initiating the flirting.

The less judged she feels, the better.

That being said, some girls with a boyfriend will feel like overtly flirting with you.

Some will do it just to have fun while making sure never to cross the line.

Others will cheat on their boyfriend.

14. How to flirt with a girl online:

Whether you’re wondering how to flirt with a girl on Instagram, how to flirt with a girl on Facebook, how to flirt with a girl on a dating app, or how to flirt with a girl on chat more generally, what you need to understand is that on these kinds of channels, there are a lot of flirting techniques you won’t be able to implement.

On a chat, you can’t use your gaze, you can’t use your cheeky smile, you can’t use physical proximity, and you can’t physically push her away…

So what can you do?

You can tease her.

And you can compliment her.

You can tease her on some stuff she writes, on some of her pics, on some element of her bio…

Just as you would in a real face-to-face conversation.

how to flirt on tinder

In order to not make the girl confused or feel insulted, don’t forget to use a smiley face when it’s not obvious that you’re teasing her ;).

As for the compliments, you can compliment her using one of her pics or something she told you about her. For instance:

“Nice legs.” (if she has nice legs)

“I like your belly.” (if she has a flat belly)

“A lawyer…hmmm, you must be quite smart ;)” (if you saw on her bio that she is a lawyer)

Don’t be afraid to compliment the girl on her physique.

These are actually the kind of compliments I prefer, since they are much more sexual than the usual compliments people will make to her.

Note that it’s important that your compliment be genuine, since it’ll allow you to deliver it in a much more natural and authentic manner.

15. How to flirt with a girl over text:

The same advice we just saw applies here as well.

Except that here, you have even fewer elements you can use to compliment her and tease her: namely, you don’t have pictures you can comment on (at least initially).

That being said, if you have her number, you probably already know her a little bit.

It can be a girl you approached earlier and with whom you had a nice interaction.

So you know a bit about her and you can compliment and tease her on what you saw in your previous interaction.

For instance:

“It was nice meeting you, I can’t help but think of the shape of your legs…I couldn’t really focus on my work today, you have a bad influence on me, young lady! ;)”

“It was nice meeting you, I can’t help but think of your dress…it didn’t leave me indifferent ;)”

You can also play with her by sending texts such as:

“Prove to me that you’re in bed.” (send this right after she says where she is or what she’s doing)

“What are you wearing right now?” (you can then ask her to send you pictures of herself)

“What are your favorite techniques for turning a guy on?”

how to flirt by textThere are many questions you can ask to initiate flirting over text.

Just be creative and playful ;).

If you enjoyed this article (and even if you didn't), I invite you to take the SOLIDITY test.

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Stay solid,
Jack


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