How to Pick Up Girls: 13 Powerful Tips (+ Things to Avoid)

If you’re tired of shitty advice when it comes to picking up girls, you’ve come to the right place.

In this article, you’re going to discover 13 powerful tips to pick up girls in an easy and natural way.

bed a girl

By implementing these tips, you’ll be able to pick up women easily and spontaneously, while staying yourself.

You won’t have to play a part like all those silly players or pickup artists you find all over the Internet.

Once you’ll master what we’re going to see here, you’ll realize that in the end, picking up a girl is quite simple.

One final note before we dive in: you don’t need to use all those techniques at once; just a few of them are enough to do the job.

If you haven't done so yet: take the SOLIDITY test to determine whether your game is solid... or weak. The test contains 13 questions you can answer very quickly; just check the boxes that best apply to you. Estimated duration: 2 minutes.

Well…

Without further ado, let’s start with the first thing you should understand when it comes to picking up girls:

1. Don’t be needy:

Strictly speaking, this is not really a tip nor a technique, but I have to start with this important advice because it is that important.

If you look needy, no matter how well you master these techniques, you will find it very hard to attract the girls that you want.

Because if you look needy, firstly, you won’t be seen as a challenge (there will be no intrigue), and secondly, you’ll appear to have low social status: the girl will sense that you don’t have many options or that she is your only option.

Because of their very nature (hypergamy), women will always be attracted to men of higher social status. A woman will always look for a man whose social status is higher than hers.

catching her attention

That’s why by behaving in a way that conveys to a girl that your social status is lower than hers, you will repulse her instead of attracting her.

You lose your value in her eyes.

It keeps her from seeing you as a potential lover.

And at this point, it’s game over.

Hence the importance of not being needy.

Or at least not showing it.

As I’ve already said, this isn’t a technique nor a tip, strictly speaking, but I had to talk about this since so many guys behave in a needy way around women.

And as a result, you can stand out by just not looking needy (especially with hot girls).

Now let’s move on to some more practical advice…

2. Complimenting:

Complimenting a girl is a very powerful pickup tip.

But unfortunately, very few guys know how to do it properly.

Very few guys know how to compliment a girl in a way that will turn her on and make her attracted to them.

shy girlHere’s how to do it:

You’re going to give a compliment in a straightforward way to the girl you want to date.

You should give your compliment in a way that communicates to the girl that you find her (sexually) attractive.

That’s one of the conditions for it to work: making a compliment which is sexually charged.

Because here is the thing:

Basically, you can make a compliment to anybody.

One can very well make a compliment to someone without flirting with them.

Thus, a standard compliment may very well leave the girl completely unmoved, and not trigger any emotion or sexual arousal.

What you need to do is make the right compliments.

Very well, Jack, I’m with you so far, but what do you mean by the “right” compliments?

When it comes to pick up girls, the best compliments you can make are ones that are sexually suggestive.

These are compliments that indicate to the girl that you find her sexually attractive.

You can compliment her physical appearance (such as a part of her body or her face), her attitude (such as her way of walking or moving), her looks (i.e. mentioning how her dress or top makes her sexy and attractive), or her personality (if she has a wild, cheeky or naughty…personality).

It shouldn’t be a compliment you could give to your little sister or grandmother.

It must indicate to the girl that you kind of see her as a sexual object (this makes women horny, despite what feminists might claim).

“I like your dress, it suits you nicely. Very sexy.”

And of course, you should deliver your compliment in a strong and masculine way, with the right tone of voice and facial expression (we’ll come back to this below).

Compliments are also very powerful when sent via text message. For example:

“I can’t stop thinking of your legs…do you work out?”

“I can’t stop thinking of your dress. You looked pretty hot in it.”

If you’re wondering how you can turn a girl on via text, keep these examples in mind (don’t simply repeat them, but use them as inspiration).

3. Look deep into her eyes:

A simple yet effective pickup tip.

This technique consists of looking very deep into the eyes of a girl, in a prolonged manner.

You look her right in the eyes, and you wait until she is the one looking away.

It will allow her to sense your dominance as well as feel that something is going on between you, and thus make her horny.

She’ll feel sexual tension.

She’ll feel undressed by your eyes.

She’ll feel desired.

4. Looking at her body:

A subtle yet powerful pickup tip.

This technique consists of deliberately looking at the girl’s sexual or erogenous body parts.

It can be her breasts, her lips, her legs…

And you’re going to make sure that she catches you doing it.

Because the goal here is to make her notice that you’re not oblivious to her charms.

This will make her think about a potential relationship with you.

She’s going to sense that something is going on between you.

And as a result, she’s going to see you as a potential lover.

Then her imagination will do the rest.

how to pick up a girl

Note: you shouldn’t stare at her like a perv, but just dwell on a sexual or erogenous body part for a second or so.

Then, once she has noticed your gaze, you start looking into her eyes again and resume the conversation as if nothing had happened.

You can even verbalize your interest by telling her right after you stop looking that you lost the thread of the conversation, having been distracted by the body part in question (that’s the same as if you had given her a compliment, this time in an indirect way).

5. Physical contact:

Physical contact is a powerful technique when it comes to picking up girls.

When you touch a woman, you create a connection between you and her. A sexual connection.

When you know how to touch a woman when interacting with her, you can create sexual tension in a subtle yet effective way. Everything occurs under the radar.

You could be talking about something as mundane as the weather and sexual arousal will still be there.

Like with compliments, physical contact is a very powerful pickup tip which allows you to quickly sexualize an interaction.

I have turned on many girls just by establishing physical contact without even complimenting them.

That being said, I’ve also turned on many girls just by complimenting them without touching them.

And many others by doing both.

6. Make women compete for your attention:

Remember what we talked about at the beginning of this post with the first pickup tip:

Women are attracted to men with higher status than them.

High-status men are men to whom women are attracted.

And when a woman realizes that a man has many options, she associates this state of abundance with high status.

When a woman realizes that a man is sought after (and chased) by other women, she will desire him even more.

It’s something that can make the difference and be enough to trigger attraction.

It is actually more of a pickup strategy than a pickup technique.

A pickup strategy that can work well and allow you to pick up many girls without much effort.

So don’t be afraid to trigger competition anxiety with the women you’re dating (if only for the purpose of testing them and determining which one deserves your time and energy the most).

7. (Pretend to) reject her:

This pickup tip can seem strange or counterintuitive at first sight, but remember what we just saw:

The importance of not being needy and the power of competition between women.

When you—temporarily or not—reject (or pretend to reject) a girl, she is instantly going to feel that you don’t need her and that you probably have multiple options.

Ideally, you should reject the girl in a playful way, so that you can maintain a positive atmosphere.

For instance:

“Too bad…it’s never going to work between us.”

“Too bad you’re blonde, I only date brunettes.”

“I’d ask you out, but you look a little wild, I’m afraid of what might happen.”

You make a remark in which you highlight the impossibility of something happening between you.

By rejecting the girl that way, she’ll feel an urge to come back to you and prove you wrong.

It’s not my favorite pickup tip, but it can yield interesting results.

Don’t abuse this technique, since it can quickly make you look like you’re trying too hard or lack social intelligence.

8. The disagreement:

When you constantly agree with a woman, you kill any sexual tension that might exist between you and her.

Because when you do that, you neuter yourself.

You smooth out all your rough edges in order to avoid emotionally shocking the girl.

And as a result, you become bland, flat, and wishy-washy.

And at that moment, the girl you want to pick up ceases to feel your masculinity. She ceases to feel the man inside you.

That’s the reason why this kind of interaction seldom leads to something.

Because it’s not by constantly agreeing with a woman or showing her that you have things in common that you’re going to interest her.

What really makes a woman horny is your masculine aura. It’s the masculine energy you radiate.

It’s this energy that is going to turn on her femininity and make her really horny.

And you can make her feel this masculinity just by disagreeing with her at some points in the conversation.

pick up women

You can make her feel it just by having a different opinion or point of view than hers and maintaining it despite the fact that she doesn’t share it.

You can also make her feel it by persuading her with a smart argument while remaining calm and grounded.

If you do this, she’ll find you much more arousing than all those bland and asexual guys who strive to agree with her on everything they can.

Because you’ll have made her feel your masculinity, to which her feminine side will be magnetically attracted.

So the next time you talk to a woman you like, resist the temptation to agree with her on everything you talk about.

Because if you fall into this trap, you can be sure that there won’t be any sexual tension between you.

9. Make innuendos:

Making sexual innuendos can be a great way to tease a girl in order to pick her up.

Sexual innuendos imply that you are a sexual man.

Innuendos are very effective when it comes to sexually charging a banal conversation.

Here are a few examples:

– Elle: You have big fingers.”
– Vous:Don’t worry, I’ll make sure not to hurt you.”

– Elle :You seem to know a lot of things.”
– Vous : “I can teach you a lot of things.” (said with a slow and deep voice while looking deep into her eyes)

10. The slow and deep voice:

Talking with a deep, slow, and smooth voice allows you to instantly make the vibe of the conversation much more sexual.

So relax.

Slow things down.

Even reduce the volume of your voice.

While at the same time looking the girl right in the eyes (as we saw previously).

At this point, no matter the words you use, the conversation will be sexually charged.

The girl will see you (and feel you) as a sexual man.

She’ll feel the sexual energy emanating from you.

She’ll feel that something is going on between you and her.

11. “Are you single?”

This tip can seem counter-intuitive or strange at first sight, but wait until you read the rest…

As you’ve probably already guessed, this involves asking the girl if she’s single.

pick up chicksBy asking her this question, you subtly communicate to her that you see her as a potential lover.

And this way you’re going to lead her to see you as a potential lover as well (and not as just a potential friend).

She’s going to tell herself right away that something might happen between you. And her imagination is going to do the rest.

This question may seem like it’ll make you look like needy, but in the end, it all comes down to the way you say it.

The key is to ask this question in a serene and somewhat loose way, yet while looking at the girl deep in her eyes (or checking her out by looking up to down).

Note: if you’ve just approached a girl, don’t ask this question within the first few seconds. Wait a few minutes at least before slipping this question into the conversation.

After you ask the question, ignore her answer.

Because what matters here is not her answer but the fact that you asked her the question.

The goal here is not to learn about this girl’s relationship, but to build sexual tension by getting her to tell herself that something is going on between you and her.

12. The ballsy projection:

A ballsy projection is a something you say to a girl that implies that you two will potentially experience a romantic/sexual relationship in the future.

It will once again get her to use her imagination to visualize a possible relationship with you.

She might not be attracted to you at the beginning, but her imagination will push her in the right direction through the diverse mental pictures she’ll form in her head (many of the tips above work the same way).

It’s a kind of conditioning.

Here are some examples of ballsy projections that you can make to a girl you want to pick up:

“You’ll have to take this off when I introduce you to my mother.” (point at her clothes)

“Is this how you intend to raise our children?” (if she just did something impolite)

“I’ll take you there for our honeymoon.” (for example, if you’re talking about dream destinations or if you walk past a travel agency)

Ideally, you should wrap up your projection in humour or deliver it in a playful tone.

13. Show vulnerability:

A lot of men want to appear perfect. And some of them manage to do so.

But when men appear perfect, it feels wrong because nothing is perfect.

When something seems perfect, it often means that something is not right.

You see where this is going?

date a girlIf you look too perfect in the eyes of a girl, she’s going to get suspicious.

Yet, in order to pick up a girl in a solid way, she must feel that she can trust you.

She must feel somewhat at ease by your side.

It’s what will allow her to experience arousing and exciting emotions around you.

That’s why you shouldn’t try to appear perfect.

If you look perfect, chances are that the girl is going to tell herself that something is wrong. And as a result, she’s not going to be able to just give in to you.

So, don’t be afraid to show vulnerability from time to time.

You can do that by just admitting some flaws. For example:

“I’m a bit slow on the uptake.”

“We played tennis last time; I’m terrible at this game.”

“I tend to be…” (blablabla)

The subtlety lies in the fact that the flaws you admit here are not big, disqualifying flaws, like “I become violent when I drink,” “I can’t attract women I like,” or so on.

When the girl realizes that you’re not afraid to share some of your flaws, she immediately realizes that you aren’t trying to appear perfect.

She immediately senses that you take it easy and that she can trust you.

You’re showing your true colors.

Quite different from all those guys who play a role when trying to pick up girls.

And above all…

She immediately feels that, since you allow yourself to appear vulnerable, you don’t need her.

And as you might guess, it makes you quite attractive in her eyes.

[BONUS 1] How to pick up girls at a bar:

Bars are great places to meet women.

People want to have fun, they’re here to meet other people, there’s music and alcohol…

All of that makes it easier for some men to approach and for some women to relax and enjoy their night.

night pick up

To approach girls in bars, guys usually try to come up with the perfect pick up line.

They want to make the perfect approach.

But here is the thing: what you’re going to say doesn’t really matter.

What matters is how you say it. It’s the emotions you convey, as well as whether you look needy or not.

You can use a “great” pickup line but completely fail if you appear needy and unsure of yourself.

And, on the other hand, you can use a banal or lame pickup line and still manage to capture the attention of a girl…if you deliver it in a solid way.

Last time I approached a group of girls in a bar, I opened the conversation by saying “Hi, what are your names?” with a confident smile and solid body language.

At first, the girls acted like they didn’t notice, but after repeating my question and remaining unshakable, they started to open up and engage with me.

After the approach, all you need to do is build some sexual tension (either by complimenting the girl or physically escalating). You can do this while talking about banal and somewhat uninteresting things.

[BONUS 2] How to pick up girls at the gym:

Girls you see at the gym are girls you’re likely to come across on a weekly or daily basis (depending on how often you go to the gym).

What is important to understand here is that social pressure can be pretty high, especially for her (people around can potentially watch her talk with a guy trying to hit on her, see how she reacts, and judge her).

how to pick up a girl at the gym

For these reasons, you’d better not use a direct approach, such as the ones you’d use to pick up a girl on the street (unless you approach the girl outside the gym).

It’s best to use an indirect approach, such as giving her useful advice (only do that if you have the muscles) or asking her for advice on an exercise girls usually do more often than men. You can also use any contextual opener appropriate for the situation and girl.

Then you can tease her and chat her up a little bit (but not too much, since both of you are likely to be busy with your workout).

From that point, you won’t be a complete stranger in her eyes anymore and will be able to talk to her more easily in the future, in order to take things further.

Note: don’t rush to get her number or ask her out. You’re going to run into her again and again.

[BONUS 3] How to pick up girls on Tinder (and other dating apps):

To be honest, Tinder is not my favorite place to pick up girls.

I’d rather approach girls in real life, since here your game can make a real difference (and girls you can meet in real life are usually hotter).

On Tinder, it’s just plain texting. There’s no body language, no facial expressions, no tone, no ballsy actions you can only do face to face.

It’s good for guys with poor game, but not so much for those with solid game.

When it comes to the approach, you can initiate contact in various ways: you can send a smiley face and wait for the girl to answer, or you can be more creative and tease the girl by using an element of her pictures or description.

Your pictures (and especially your profile picture) play an important role, since they’re what the girls on the app will notice first.

Ideally, your pictures should convey non-neediness, social intelligence, and social status (as well as the masculine traits that women are looking for in a man).

[BONUS 4] How to pick up girls at a party:

Parties are among the best places to pick up girls.

They’re like bars or nightclubs, but with much more open and receptive girls. Here’s why:

At a friend’s party, you are pre-validated.

Not like in a bar or a club.

You’re not a complete stranger which might pose a threat.

You’ve been invited and as a result, you’re not just anybody.

The rules are basically the same as picking up girls at a bar or club, it’s just that it’s easier.

[BONUS 5] How to pick up girls on Facebook or Instagram:

Like with Tinder, Facebook and Instagram are not my favorite places when it comes to picking up girls, for the same reasons as stated above.

But that being said, if you’re lucky, you can still meet some hot girls on those social media sites.

Just make sure you have a solid profile, and open the girl by teasing her for an element of her profile or by sending her something funny.

If you enjoyed this article (and even if you didn’t), you’ll love this other extensive post I recently published:

=> COMMAND RESPECT INSTANTLY: How to Be Seen as a Strong and Powerful Man (Starting Today)

There’s something you need to understand:

Before seeking to attract women, you should first seek to attract men.

Because above all, women want to be with guys with whom men want to be.

The man who has only female friends is suspect.

Girls tell themselves that something must be wrong with him.

They don’t trust him.

And this prevents them from being really attracted to him.

Before seeking to be admired by women, you must first seek to be admired by men.

You must be a man that men respect.

When you’re a man that naturally commands respect, you’re far better off, both with other men and then with women: directly and indirectly.

And today, we’re going to see precisely how you can command respect.

You’re going to learn how you can adopt a mindset and an attitude that get others to respect you.

Without really changing your personality or who you are.

Because here, we’re going to work on your attitude.

We’re going to work on your aura.

We’re going to work on your ability to make others feel who is the boss (all this without coming off as a tyrant or as a guy who’s trying to crush others).

It’s all there:

=> COMMAND RESPECT INSTANTLY: How to Be Seen as a Strong and Powerful Man (Starting Today)

Stay solid,
Jack


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